forged in the stars
by words-with-dragons
Summary: He's a former solider. She's a former scavenger. Together, maybe they can build something new. / The Force Awakens speculation, spoilers. [Rey/Finn]
1. forged by the stars

forged in the stars

He's a former solider. She's a former scavenger. Together, maybe they can build something new. / The Force Awakens speculation, spoilers. [Rey/Finn]

* * *

She can tell he's like her. It's not in their skin, nor eyes, or even political similarities. What does a soldier of the First Order have in common with a nameless scavenger? But still, she can see herself in him, in the way he carries himself. He's lost, he's alone.

If there's one thing beyond waiting that Rey knows, it's being alone. But she still doesn't know his name, even as they fly away from Jakku on a ship she's heard stories about her whole life, and she voices this.

"Finn." It's soft, with surprising steel behind it. She thinks it will come to suit him in time. "What's yours?"

It's not a question she's been asked often. More often is _who are you_? That's easier to answer. She's no one. She belongs to nothing and owns nothing. A scavenger scraping by on the outskirts. Yet now, she's in the middle of everything and her head is spinning faster than lightspeed. She needs to find something to ground her.

As she replies, "I'm Rey," her lips twitch upwards, and their eyes meet. She thinks maybe it can be him. Maybe they can be alone together.

* * *

Han is grouchier than the stories made him out to be. He says the Dark side, the Force, the Jedi, are real. Not just stories, or legends. Real.

It's clear afterwards that Finn hasn't heard as many stories as she has. She supposes whatever he has heard has been marred, filtered through the First Order agenda. He's quiet, purses his lips and nods, but there's no real remembrance in his eyes. She's surprised at how warm they seem, even when he's confused.

"Would you like to hear some?" Rey asks, her voice slightly rough from disuse. She isn't used to doing this much talking in such a short time, even if the Millennium Falcon is much cooler than the deserts of Jakku.

Finn licks his lips, eyes darting to her and then away again. "If it's not too much trouble," he says, looking at the floor.

She smiles softly. "Well, long, long ago, in a galaxy far, far away..."

She's never thought of herself as a storyteller, but she sees stars in his eyes as he looks at her rapt attention and she feels a swell of pride, warmth spreading through her chest. It's much more pleasant than the sun, softer, more gentle. Rey decides she likes it. Likes him. It'd be nice to have a friend besides the droid BB-8.

When she's finally done, Finn grins at her. "You're quite the storyteller Rey..." he bites his lip, his grin faltering and he suddenly looks a little nervous. "I'd like to hear _your_ story, if you don't mind."

Rey's eyes widen, and she can tell an apology is already on the tip of his tongue, when she smiles slightly. "In due time, Finn." She likes the way his name sounds in her mouth. Likes the way hers sounds in his, like it's safe. Like it's cared for. She's never really been cared for, but she figures it must feel something like this. Sharing stories, meals, smiles.

Fin's grin softens into something gentle and settles into her core, and she wants to make sure she remembers it. All the years on Jakku blurred together - lonely days and nights - but this, this is something she'll always remember. "I'll be happily waiting, then."

She knows what it's like to wait, and he does too. But now, maybe, they're a little less alone.

* * *

Rey has never known winter. Han describes the ice-planet of Hoth, but it doesn't make much sense to her, and nothing really sticks. Snow is a foreign concept, as is a bitter chill beyond the cool nights on Jakku, but even those were relief from the blaring hot sun throughout the day.

But ever since the Falcon's heater broke, she imagines winter is something like this, cold seeping into her bones, piling on extra layers. She wonders how people can stand it. Han is used to it, droids don't know the difference really, Chewbacca has his thick coat of fur, and Finn's been trained to survive any extreme weather conditions.

So she's cold, and irritated by the fact there's no one to voice her complaints to. It never bothered her before - before they were never any options - but she's used to sharing now. She's not sure if it's a good thing or a bad thing.

"You cold?"

Finn's voice, laced with concern, breaks through the icy fog in her mind. Frowning, Rey grumbles, "Jakku was never cold." She never thought she'd miss anything about the planet, but here she is, shivering and pulling her shawl tighter around her shoulders. She thinks Finn might be smiling at her, and shoots him a glare.

He holds up his hands in mock surrender, and then shrugs off his pale brown jacket. She watches him, confused, and then understands as he holds it out to her. "Here, it'll help."

She doesn't take it. "But what about you?" Some part of her brain chides her for asking. In the desert you take what you need to survive and do whatever you have to, not worry about other people more than yourself. Yet, Han and Chewie and Finn have changed her, slowly. Especially Finn.

"I'll be fine," he assures her, and she can't help but believe him. She's still hesitant to take the jacket, so he stands up and drapes it across her shoulders, lifting her lower bun out of the way gentle, his hands brief and light. He knows she isn't used to much physical contact, but somehow she doesn't mind his hands, his fingers brushing against her back. His warmth seems to bleed into hers.

"Better?" he asks, sitting down next to her.

She feels heat rise to her cheeks and pulls his jacket tighter around her so she doesn't have to look at him. Which is a mistake, because the collar presses against her nose and she catches a whiff of smoke, sand and some kind of aftershave, and she realizes it's what he smells like. Realizes how it's actually kind of nice. Her face is positively burning, but she manages to mumble out, "Yeah. Thanks."

Finn smiles, looking pleased with himself. "Good."

* * *

"You'll end up leaving me."

The fear escapes her lips before she can think it through properly. Thinking straight when she's tired has never been her forte, and the one memory she has of her parents replays often in her dreams, turning them into nightmares. Why didn't they want her? Why did they abandon her? She thinks after all these years, she'll never find out the answer. But maybe Finn will, and he'll leave her too.

His small room is right across from hers, and it was too tempting, too easy, to walk over and rap her knuckles across the door. She has a feeling he wasn't sleeping either.

And then, as soon as he asks, "What's wrong?" the words come spilling out of her because for some reason she trusts Finn. Maybe it's because they were thrown into this crazy situation together. Maybe it's because she genuinely likes him. Maybe some other reason, or all of the above. Liking people is a very confusing thing.

Finn frowns at her, and then gets out of his bed and walks over to her, and she's practically shaking. She can't bare to look at him, to see disappointment, or that she was right, in his eyes, so instead she stares at the floor.

"Rey," he says, and his voice is so gentle she wants to melt into it. "Why would you think that?"

"My parents left me. No one's ever stayed with me, why would you be any different?" she manages out. Her throat and eyes and heart burn and she hates it hates it _hates it_ that she ever let someone get this close. Hold this much power over her. What happened to being independent? To being okay being lonely?

"Rey," he says again, this time his voice tinged with sadness. Not pity, she thinks gratefully, and she's shocked as he stoops low so she has to look him in the eye, but merely turns away again. She can feel his eyes on her, burning her with his gaze, and then his fingers are on her cheek, gently brushing her skin and turning her back towards him. His fingers are still on her cheek, soft and grounding, seemingly keeping her in his orbit. She can't turn away again. "I am not going to leave you."

"But-"

His thumb strokes her cheek and her words die in her throat. "I am not going to leave you," he repeats, this time as a promise, and she can feel the weight of it, only instead of weighing her down, it seems to lift her up. The lump in her throat is easier to swallow. "No matter what happens, I'll find my way back to you."

"Why?" she croaks.

"That's what a scavenger does, isn't it?" he says with a twitch of his lips, a corner of his mouth lifting. "They find and collect lost things. You've collected me, Rey, and I plan on keeping it that way."

Part of her wants to the touch his lips, her eyes following the way they curve upwards so effortlessly, but it feels too soon. She's not ready, and she has a feeling he's not quite ready either, but that's okay. Instead, Rey takes his fingers away from his cheek, and squeezes them, before stepping forwards. She tucks her body into his, and wraps her arms loosely around her torso. It's wide and warm and solid, and she rests her face against his chest, burying herself in that warmth, the steadiness. She needs it, even if she isn't ready to admit that maybe she needs him too. He wraps his arms loosely around her waist, obviously surprised but far from unpleased.

If he's her lost thing, maybe she's always been missing him. Maybe she's always been meant to be in his orbit.

The stars shine brighter in the morning, not nearly as bright as her smile as she greets him at breakfast. She has him. Despite the chaos, the war on the horizon, somehow, she believes things will be alright.

Rey knows he's like her, and she knows he's different, and she knows there's space in between she still hasn't discovered, but she wants to, and she hopes they'll have the time they deserve.

But, as she sits next to him, she's content not to think of the future - waiting for what may or may happen for once. Where she is right now, as Finn flashes her a smile, is pretty good.


	2. starlight

starlight

* * *

Rey knows that by this time tomorrow, she will very likely be dead. The sun has been absent for hours, and even the stars and moons of Jakku are beginning to fade. How fitting, that this will all end the same place it began. It seems like so long ago she had stumbled upon BB-8, then was running for her life with a strange stormtrooper sprinting along with her.

The droid is charging against the wall, a shaft of moonlight illuminating it, casting a tiny round shadow over the small balcony Rey stands on. It's one of the tallest buildings in Jakku's makeshift capitol city, and was chosen for this precise reason: it's make lookout much easier. Right now though, Rey simply stares at the stormtrooper across from her. He's long discarded his old armour, instead sporting simple clothes and a pale brown jacket stretched over his broad shoulders.

He's her friend. He's Finn, built to be a machine like the ones she scavenged from in the sands of this planet, only he's made of easy smiles and soft laughs instead of a mindless instinct to obey and kill, which is what the First Order wants. He's broken the mould, and he's broken her walls. She doesn't really know how - she supposes life-or-death situations can help people bond quickly - but she also thinks it's something about him, his persistence to be kind in the face of a cruel world.

She admires him. She thinks she might even love him.

And now she doesn't now if he's - if either of them - are still going to be here when it's over, because no matter the outcome of tomorrow, it will be end of this crazy adventure.

She doesn't want it to be the end of them.

Rey opens her mouth to speak, but the lump in her throat is too hard to swallow. But she thinks Finn understands as he takes a step closer to her.

"Rey," he says softly, his voice low and deep and warm. Not scorching like the desert, but gentle and safe and it let's her forget about the danger waiting them for a moment. "Thank you." His eyes meet hers and he smiles, inclining his head. She sees his fingers twitch and knows he wants to reach out for her, but also knows he's aware she's still not fully used to a lot of physical contact, and his respect for her sends a rush of affection through her that's so strong it threatens to overflow. "No matter what happens tomorrow...I'm glad you've been my friend."

Rey feels some of that affection spill over in the form of a tear, sliding down her cheek. She tries to swallow the lump in her throat because her voice needs to work. She and Finn are used to silence - it's an accepted, comfortable part of their relationship; _you do your thing, and I'll do mine_ \- but words _matter_ when there's so little time left. A few hours at most.

If physical contact is a struggle, expressing herself is even harder. For so long, she never had anyone to express herself too. And now she feels so much, how can she ever say describe it adequately in words?

She swallows hard, and slowly reaches for his hand. His fingers are rough, calloused and warm, much like her own, and she slides her fingers tentatively through his. She lightly tugs him closer and Finn follows; he always follows. If there's one thing she knows she can count on, it's him, and she doesn't want that to ever change.

"But," she begins, staring at their interlocked hands. "But what if I...want to be more?"

Finn's eyes widen as a blush creeps up the back of her neck and across her cheeks, burning her with shame, yet she can't bring herself to look away. He steps closer to her, taking her hand in both of his own, and she forgets to breathe as he asks, "What if I want that too?"

Her heart is pounding as loudly as a spaceship's engines before takeoff, and she's sure he can hear it, the sound crossing the short distance between them, gradually growing closer. His breath ghosts the curve of her cheek as one of his hands goes to cup it, stroking his thumb across her smooth skin.

"Rey..." his voice is barely audible. "Can..." he draws her gaze away from his eyes as he nervously licks his lips, and they've never been this close, this reachable. "Can I kiss you?"

The word 'yes' sticks in her throat, so Rey can only nod, leaning in and pausing midway, her breath catching in her throat too as Finn closes the distance, and his mouth presses softly against hers. His lips are warm, slightly chapped. She's never kissed anyone, and it's a relief he hasn't either. The kiss is a little clumsy, which is to be expected, but it's still so wonderful because it's _him_. If anyone was going to be her first kiss, she's glad it's her best friend.

It's also a little hard to think straight, as he pulls away, her lungs caving in on her, her heart swelling, because her lips tingle with electricity and all she can think about is how much she wants to kiss him again. So she does, tilting her head up to meet his lips this time, and one of his arms slowly, cautiously, winds itself around her waist, pulling her closer.

Rey rests her forehead against his as she breaks the kiss, feeling breathless and giddy, yet also sad. She doesn't want to lose him. She doesn't know if she can handle, and she doesn't want to find out the answer. She wants to spend the rest of her life not knowing the answer.

"Come back to me," she whispers, her hands resting on his chest, over his heart. Maybe if she tries hard enough, she can use to the Force to will it to keep beating.

His arm tightens around her. "Only if you do," he murmurs with a small smile.

A teary laugh spills out of her. "I guess that's fair."

"Well, all's fair in love and war, isn't it?" Finn asks. His smile falters, their happiness slipping through their fingers like sand as the weight of tomorrow settles over both their shoulders, and Rey's just grateful he's there to share the burden. "I'll find you when it ends," he promises, reluctantly letting go of her.

Rey interlocks their fingers again. "Not if I find you first," she says, injecting confidence into her voice, and Finn chuckles softly, fondness filling up his eyes. "And we...we can continue what we've started." She's never particularly cared for labels, not having much use of them, but she wouldn't mind being called his.

Finn gives her a small smile. "I'd like that." He slides his fingers out of hers, instead wrapping his around hers and lifting her hand up to his lips. He brushes his lips across her knuckles.

Rey laughs shakily as he lets go of her hand. "Be safe, Finn."

"You too."

He leaves her on the balcony, and she listens to the door close behind him; she can't watch him leave, so she keep she gaze on the stars shining up above. Some peoples believe in gods and higher beings, she remembers. Many of them plot out constellations, give the stars meaning beyond science, beyond reason.

She sends up a prayer, the starlight illuminating her face, now streaked with tears. _Please keep him safe._

* * *

She's pretty sure her leg is broken. All Rey knows is that it hurts like hell, and that there's a wound in her side that's bleeding, and she's limping through the Resistance's campgrounds looking for Finn. She passes multiple medic tents but doesn't stop, nor at the celebratory parties - and winning the battle, the war, is plenty reason to celebrate - because she can't. Not until she finds him.

"Rey!"

A wave of relief washes over her as her ears perk at the sound of his voice, and she turns around to see him standing only a few tents behind her. There's a bandage wrapped around his side, his face scraped up, but he's alive, his voice hoarse as he shouts, "REY!" again, as if in disbelief.

"Finn!"

Rey limps over to him but he reaches her first and steadies her as she practically crashes into him. "Told you," he breathes, a grin breaking over his face that mirrors her own. Her hands reach up to cup his face as she pulls him into a kiss, and when she pulls away she wipes away the tear sliding down his cheek.

"Only because my leg is broken," she says, not caring that it's not very romantic, but now that she knows he's safe, her body is finally giving into her pain.

Finn winces when he catches sight of her injuries, and he stoops and slings her arm over her shoulders, sharing her weight. Rey's never felt lighter. "It's nothing they won't be able to fix up," he tells her confidently, to ease her non-existent worries. She knows she'll be okay. Both of them will be more than okay now.

When night comes (she's lived beyond her expected timeline) she sends up a thank you to the stars. She's sitting at a table, her leg propped up on another chair, Finn by her side as everyone dances and celebrates around her with music and laughter. She prefers the quiet of their corner, still not used to be around large amounts of people, but she smiles when Finn grabs her hand.

"So?" he says with a mischievous smile. "Can we continue what we started?"

She leans in and pecks him briefly across the lips. "One day at a time," she says, revelling in it, because they have time now, and Finn's eyes crinkle, glistening with starlight, and she knows he's just as grateful.

She sends up a thank-you to the stars, and then squeezes his hand. They have time now.


	3. breakfast & dance lessons

**These are two small drabbles, written before the Force Awakens came out. So if anything is OOC that's why, and I guess the second one is AU since it's set during a happy time after the movie and I don't know yet how the movie actually ended** **so... but here's a bit of fic anyway! Hope you enjoy.**

* * *

 _i. breakfast_

It's been a long time since Rey has had something to eat other than strange misshapen catci and desert snakes and lizards. And she's never shared a meal with someone before, so sitting across from Finn as the Millennium Falcon speeds through the stars is a strange, but not unwelcome situation.

Finn nudges the box of Bantha breakfast biscuits closer to her. "They're not bad," he shrugs, nibbling on the end of one.

Rey takes one with a small smile. "Neither are you," she says quietly, and Finn returns her small smile.

"Is that a compliment?" he asks good naturedly.

"Only if you want it to be," Rey replies.

"I'll take it as one then," Finn says, and Rey nearly laughs.

Not bad at all.

* * *

 _ii. dance lessons_

* * *

Rey had never had a chance to admire Finn before. They had always been nearly dying, or sweating and dirty and bleeding, or running for their lives. Things like that didn't leave a lot of time to admire the warmth of his eyes, the deep brown of his skin, the flash of his smile. Now those things were, embarrassingly enough, at the forefront of her mind.

You could say whatever you liked about the Resistance, but in the wake of a victory, they sure knew how to throw a fancy party. Armour had been discarded in favour of crisp suits and flowing dress robes. Rey herself had never worn fabric so soft, a flowing dress of pale blue that reached the floor, with sleeves and a collar up to chin of lace.

She couldn't marvel at her own newfound elegance for long, her eyes drawn to Finn talking with Han and Chewie only a few feet away. He had traded his usual brown jacket for a pristine one of black, with a clean, white dress shirt underneath. He was handsome. Very, very handsome.

Which was great, as an observation, but she had no idea what to do with the information. It didn't help that Han and Chewie kept looking over in her direction, and Finn was being increasingly embarrassed about something she guessed was probably her. Why would he be embarrassed though? They were friends, good friends, she knew, if she didn't have many friendships, or any at all, to compare her and Finn's too.

Rey bit down on her bottom lip, deciding she'd had enough, and marched over to the trio and tapped Finn on the shoulder. He nearly yelped at the sight of her and a blush coloured his cheeks. "Oh, h-hey Rey." Han shot him a smug, knowing look and Finn glared daggers at him before turning back to Rey, his blush deepening. "So, er…"

Rey held out her hand. "Wanna dance?" She didn't care she had never really danced before - she knew Finn hadn't either, as stormtrooper training didn't include dance classes - and she knew he was unlikely to reject her offer, but a bit of hesitance crept into the end of her question, her hand hovering in the air.

Then, just like he had when they had first met - him, lying in the burning sand and her, unaware of what they were getting themselves into - he took her hand. And just like then, he followed her lead as they walked out onto the dance floor. Rey turned to face him again, and placed her free hand on his shoulder. He placed his loosely on her waist, almost as if he was afraid, and she had to hide a smile. He seemed even more nervous than she was, as they clumsily tried to find a rhythm with the music and each other.

"I don't bite you know," she said, a teasing lilt in her voice. Finn seemed to relax a little.

"Sorry, I'm just a little nervous," he shrugged, his Adam's apple bobbing as he swallowed hard.

"I don't have much dancing experience either," she told him, but Finn shook his head.

"Nah, it's not that, or it's not the main reason anyway," his eyes darted away from her and Rey frowned.

"Why're you nervous then?" she said curiously. "It looked like Han and Chewie were giving you a hard time about something." Feelings weren't her strong suit, but the least she could do was listen, right? Finn was her friend, and that was what friends did: they helped each other, whether by watching each other's back in a battle, or just listening. Both were equally important, she had found.

"Oh, they were just…being dumb, teasing me, you know," Finn cleared his throat, his eyes meeting hers before they looked away again. Han's teasing was nothing new, but why was Finn being so shy about it? Had one of Han's quips struck a chord? She lightly squeezed his hand. "About how I, kind of wanted to…to ask you to dance," he finished lamely.

Rey's only coherent thought was, "Oh," and it slipped out between her lips, parted in surprise. So she was the reason for his nervousness. A pleasant warmth spread through her chest, heat rushing to her cheeks, her lips twitching upwards before she fully smiled. It was small, and slightly smug, but Finn hesitantly smiled back at her. "You don't have to be nervous," she said smoothly. "You're a pretty good dance partner."

"I thought you didn't have much experience?" Finn said, raising an eyebrow, and Rey chuckled softly.

"So we can learn together, then," Rey proposed, and Finn nodded.

"You're always the one with the plan Rey." He followed her steps as they waltzed across the dance floor, sharing easy smiles, bright eyes catching each other's.

He'd always be willing to follow her, wherever that may be.


	4. Finn's Awakening (post-TFA)

FINN'S AWAKENING

* * *

When Finn woke up, Rey was gone. BB-8 and Poe were sitting by his side, but Finn sat up in a blind panic. Rey. Kylo. Rey being thrown against the tree, not waking up, so cold, nearly motionless-

"Rey–" His voice was rough from disuse as he blinked the bleariness from his eyes. "Where's Rey?!"

Poe pushed him back down onto the bed. "Take it easy there Finn. Rey's fine."

"But Kylo, he threw her against the tree, she wasn't moving she-" Finn rambled on, forcing himself into a sitting position, and seeing black spots dance in his vision as a wave of pain shot through his body from his back.

"Rey is okay Finn," said Poe, pushing him more firmly back into a lying down position. "She faced Kylo herself and won, and then went back for you. She's okay. You got hurt pretty bad, so don't strain yourself."

Vaguely, Finn could remember the heat searing into his shoulder, his back, burning away flesh. As he calmed down - Rey winning against Kylo seemed unlikely to anyone who didn't know her - he took in his surroundings. He was lying on a flat, stiff bed with tubes in his arm, and a heartbeat monitor hooked up by his side. He could feel scratchy bandages wrapped tightly around his injured shoulder and all along his torso. He knew he was probably lucky to be alive.

Still, he must have been missing something. Had he been out of it for a long time? Because if Rey was okay, than... a lump rose his throat. Why wasn't she here? Hadn't...didn't she care enough to wait for him to wake up? To see if he was okay? The first person he had ever had as a true, real friend and...His eyes burned.

Poe caught sight of the look on his face and frowned. "Hey, she really wanted to be here Finn. Stayed by your side night and day as long as she could." Well, that lessened the pain a little. "But the map to Luke Skywalker was finished and well, Rey couldn't wait any longer. She left two days ago, to start her training with him."

"Skywalker? She's training with _Luke Skywalker_?" Finn gaped, eyes wide as Poe nodded. Well, if that wasn't a good reason for her not being here than he didn't know what was. "T-that's amazing!" Jedi. Rey was going to become a Jedi, and he knew she'd be fantastic at it. She was fantastic at anything, really. Finn relaxed into the bed. It was as comfortable as his one back in the First Order.

Poe went to clap him on the shoulder, but then paused midway, remembering his injury, and let his hand fall to his side. Finn swallowed the lump in his throat. "So," he said finally, "how long was I out?"

"Two weeks," Poe answered, and then smiled a little. "I wish I could stay, now that you're awake, but I have to go help with vessel repairs. BB-8 can keep you company, right?"

Finn peered down at the little droid, who beeped happily at him. "Yeah, we have an understanding."

At the very least, he was sure BB-8 would soon be missing Rey just as much as he did - well, maybe not as much, but close to it. He wished, not for the first time, he had Rey's talents with languages, and could speak fluent droid, especially as the hours passed and he barely spoke a word, not that there was much he wanted to say, and his throat was still very dry. A medic came by and informed Finn more about his condition - healing muscle, burn salves, borderline coma - but it was hard to concentrate. Some pain medication knocked him out again for a few hours, and when he woke up BB-8 was gone, probably off charging, and the room was dark.

Finn wished there were windows. It was odd, not being able to see the stars, and knowing it was night. His barracks in the First Order hadn't had any windows, but he had always liked glimpsing stars out of the ship's vast windows. And it was a comforting thing to know that no matter how far away Rey was, they'd end up falling asleep under the same stars. Not tonight, not really.

But, he thought with a tiny smile, she had stayed by his side for 12 days, longer than they had even known each other in person.

 _See you soon, Rey..._

 _I hope._


	5. rumours & attachment

**a couple of drabbles set post-TFA, from Rey's perspective, i hope you enjoy them.**

* * *

 _i. rumours_

Rey's used to people's staring and whispering by now. Murmurs of the Force, of Luke Skywalker and her name, of the Jedi. She doesn't expect to catch Finn's name, her ears tuned to any word of him. He's been on a mission with Poe for a few days now.

"Apparently General Organa is thinking about promoting him-" a droid, looking like a silver C-P30 mutters to a small cleaning droid, who whirrs and buzzes in reply.

Rey smiles softly as she rounds the corner. If anyone deserves to be a General, it's Finn. He's talented, he's strong.

"Oh, her?" the silver droid continues. "I think that's his girlfriend."

Heat rushes to Rey's cheeks, but she doesn't stop to correct them that she and Finn are not, in fact, dating. As far as rumours go, those are both ones she likes.

* * *

 _ii. attachment_

* * *

Rey has never missed anyone before.

She's waited, 15 years in fact, for her family. She can hardly remember them. A glimpse of a bright smile, a trace of warm hands on her shoulders, and she clings to it. They must have loved her. They must have. But here, on the remnants of a planet, hidden away in the far reaches of the galaxy, she's had to realize what she's known deep down for years: they're not coming back. So she moves on. And she doesn't miss them, not really; she supposes she can't miss what she can't really remember.

But she does miss Finn. Her memories of him are painfully fresh, the brightness of his smile, the lightness in his laugh. The warmth of his hand, holding hers. She feels a little bad of shrugging him off. She just wasn't used to physical contact. Now, she wishes he was here with her, to keep her company.

Luke is a kind man but a very, very tough teacher. Beads of sweat drip down her brow as she balances her full weight on her less dominant hand, pressing into the soft earth of the small islands, surrounded by sea. She's never been around so much water, or wetness. Now that she knows what it is to be among friends - or, a friend - it is more isolating than ever to be apart. Especially when she had to leave before he woke up.

"You are distracted," Luke muses, watching her with thoughtful eyes.

Rey groans, her arm shaking, muscles straining to keep her upright, but she gives in and lets herself crumple onto her back, landing on the damp grass with a soft thud. "What makes you say that?" she doesn't mean for it to sound slightly sarcastic, but it creeps into her voice anyway as she slips off her grey gauntlets, the cool air refreshing on her sweaty skin.

"Your thoughts keep wandering, young Padawan," Luke strides over to her, only instead of holding out his hand to help her up, he simply sits down next to her. "The Force isn't even necessary to tell. There is something on your mind, troubling you. Your attachments are clouding your concentration."

"Attachment," Rey mumbles. Luke hums, raising his eyebrow in a wordless question. "Attachment, like singular...He...I had - _have_ a friend. He's injured, Kylo nearly killed him, the doctors say he's in a coma and I wanted to be there when he woke up but..." she pushes herself into a sitting position, blinking rapidly. "I suppose that's a bad thing though? A Jedi must release their attachments. Or at least that's what the old stories say. I'll have to let him go, right?"

Luke seems to ponder this, and Rey wishes he'd just give her an answer. "Yes, and no."

"Oh that's a very clear message," she snaps.

Luke merely chuckles. "You didn't let me finish." Her angry look softens. "An attachment can be both a good and bad thing. When the Dark side is most tempting, you must cling to your loved ones to guide you towards the Light, whether they're the reason you're in pain or not. You can love him fiercely, just do not let that love destroy you."

"I..." a lump rises in her throat, because she was going to say she doesn't love Finn, how can she when she's so unsure of what love even is? But she thinks of him, the first person to ever come back for her, and of his pain giving her the strength to face Kylo, how he had nearly died for her. If that is not love, than what is? "I'll...take your lesson to heart," she says finally, swallowing hard.

In what way she loves Finn exactly, she still isn't sure, but she does know she loves him.

Luke's eyes turn sad, yet a fond smile graces his lips. "I'm sure you already have."


End file.
